I feel so horrible. I ate, or well drank, a huge cup of smoothie and I feel so sick. For my own sake, I’m trying to purge it, but I’m not sure if I will make it. Dad is going to force me to eat dinner today as well, and I hate it. 
   Also I’m really worried about the vacation. My parents are taking me to Turkey for three whole weeks, and I’m not sure how that will work out.
1. I have scars and wounds all over my body, who they don’t know about.. It’s going to be hell..
2. I already struggle to eat something at all during a week, and down there with my parents they will watch me every single minute and make sure that I eat at least 4-5 times a day! It’s going to be a living nightmare even worse than the one I’m in now. 
3. It’s going to be nearly impossible to purge..
4. I’m going to fucking gain weight, and I don’t know what I’ll do to myself three fucking weeks without a scale..
5. On the bright side; Cheap cigarettes and alcohol. “Yay me” .. Aaand, I’m getting a tattoo and probably a piercing (: